My Tiniest Teacher

There is something about watching Paul sleep that I can’t get over. When he finally surrenders the kicks and coos to the great god of sleep, he shuts his big eyes so tightly, as if he’s blinking in and looking inside himself. His eyelashes sweep up towards the sky, his lips form the tiniest O, and gradually his arms and legs settle with the most subtle shifts. When he falls asleep on me, Paul fills me with an inner peace and calm that is centering in a way few moments are these days. It’s as though with him in my arms, bad things are unimaginable, and there is time for everything the world has to offer…just later. He is exactly who he is meant to be. There is no pretense, no concern for what he should be or might be or will be or was. He experiences the world one new sensation, sight, emotion at a time. Just another thing he is teaching us about how to live. What wisdom we have when we are first becoming.